Friday, January 20, 2017

Part 1A: How Not to Suck at... Accountability (in Life)


Every leadership book I have ever read has a chapter on accountability, but leaders are not the only ones that need to be accountable for their actions and the things that happen to them. We all need to take a step back and realize and accept the fact that allot of the issues in our lives are our fault… yeah, I said it. It’s YOUR FAULT. We always want to take credit for the good; realize that we need to start taking credit for the bad too. Once you’ve done that then you can take action to do better. And we want to do better, right?

A.                 ... In Life

I did it, I broke the cardinal rule when I comes to money. I co-signed a small loan for a close friend. I was young and dumb and I’d done it before with others with no problems. Till this day I love them like a brother. They promised on their mother’s grave that they wouldn’t miss a payment and that there would be no issues. I knew them well, I trusted them – I believed in them and knew that they wanted to do better. I believed in their dream and success.

The truth is no one asking for a favor will ever tell you that they can come through on their end. I don’t know if its pride, blindness, optimism and just a straight up, cold hearted lie; but you never hear “hey man, I need this favor and I’m probably going to screw you over in the end. But I want you to help me anyway.”

Life was all good for a while. Then the calls started. The bank was looking for me to make payments that were past due. They would call me, I would call him, he would promise to pay, the calls would stop – repeat. I figured that sense they weren’t calling that life was all good. I was wrong.  I pull my yearly credit report and found out my A1 credit was now “fair.” I was HOT. I called, I cussed, and was ready to fight… and then I paid the pass due balance. Set up auto payment and required them to pay me directly.

Most people would want to say it was his fault. He missed the payments. He defaulted. He lied.

The reality is it’s my fault. I agreed to the loan, I let the phone calls slide, I believed he was doing as he claimed he was. I should have been more involved and intrusive to the situation. I failed at life. Yeah, he has some blame, but I failed myself and honestly can’t blame anyone but myself.

The situation didn’t change until I became accountable and made sure things happened. Sure, I can say that this happened to me but it’s more like I let this happen to me.

The same is true in most things in life. We want to cry that the world and the man is out to get us but the reality is that we are generally passive and allow things to happen. Take charge, take control, and take a few seconds to figure out how we can change a situation. Be accountable! Realize that the problem or the solution is you!

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