So I got to have that conversation I wanted to have with the person I wanted to have it with. Didn’t hear what I wanted to hear, and in fact heard some things that I didn’t expect to hear. But all in all, even though the outcome wasn’t in my favor, I just FEEL BETTER. Being able to go into the New Year knowing EXACTLY where I stand is what I wanted for Christmas.
She wasn’t able to give me any direct answers, but she indirectly answered all my questions. I had been debating whether it was time to let go, and it is. If it was meant to be then it will happen, and if it isn’t then we’ll find happiness elsewhere. Maybe when /if she’s ever ready I hope she’ll let me know. But I see I needed to stop “nurturing” something that she was fighting against.
Everyone says that relationships are hard work, but apparently so is liking someone. I don’t think I’ve ever really wanted something/someone that was easy to obtain, but with the allure of trying comes the reality that you may not ever succeed. My favorite line from John Legends new CD is “Love hurts sometimes when you do it right.” I whole heartily agree, and I guess this is one of those times.