Friday, February 17, 2017

Part 3A. How Not to Suck at... Letting Go (in Life)

A huge part of moving onward and upward to better things is having the courage to stop looking backwards. Not letting go of the past is probably one of the greatest obstacles to having something better. There is a fear associated with holding on to something that’s just ok even with there is a possibility of something better waiting on us. We’re comfortable with what we have, even though it’s not perfect it’s, what’s we’re used to. It’s familiar. Unfortunately that familiarity could be holding us back from what we really want – what we really need to be where we want to be.

A.                 …in Life


Before there is room for anything new in our lives, we must clean out some of the old stuff. It’s like spring cleaning. It’s all that stuff laying around that no longer serves a purpose. It used to. We had a reason for buying it when we did, but now we’re just keeping it just because. Because it’s nostalgic or because we might use it one more time – one day. Or because “insert random excuse here.” Fact is, we don’t really need it anymore… and there no room for the stuff we do need.

I freaking loved college. Those were easily the best 4…umm, 5 years of my life. The friends, the fun, the adventures, the life lessons, the plethora of women, the freedom, the lack of real responsibility. I felt like I was living THE LIFE. After undergrad I had a good job offer with my current company but I wanted to stay in college as long as possible. So when the opportunity to stay longer (grand school) my decision was 90% staying to kick it, 5% the free ride and 5% getting a masters. I wanted to live this life as long as possible. I didn’t want to let go.

Undergrad commencement came. We partied hard, we stayed up late but most of all we gradated. We walked the stage, they left. I stayed. That first year was ok - it wasn’t the same, but it was cool. It wasn’t like it was. My friends had started to move on and the things I liked about college weren’t fun anymore. I was older than most everyone, my interests didn’t match those of the underclassmen. I wanted and needed more but I was trying to be fulfilled in something I should have let go of – college life. What I was used to and found enjoyable as an undergrad wasn’t enough anymore.

Year 2 was rough. I was ready to go! Most everyone I really knew was gone and I was stuck. See, had I let go when I should have I could have moved on to the next stage in life, started at my job, became real adult. But because I didn’t want to let go of what I had… because I wanted to live in the past… because I was uncomfortable with change I spent 2 years chasing a forgotten dream. When the degree was done and I had the next job offer I took it.


I couldn’t move to the next stage until I was ready and let go of what I had. It was great for a season. It was perfect as an 18-22 year old. I out grew it and tried to make use of something that no longer fit. Letting go of the past had to happen before I could live in and succeed in my future. 

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